My Reset Routine || 2019

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Now that it’s 2019 some of us may be looking to make a change, have a complete life makeover, or just shed some layers of 2018. At this point I’m looking at doing all 3.

Like all end-of-the-year traditions I found myself in yet another moment of existentialism where I questioned who I was, what that meant, and where the heck I was going. Basically my New Years Eve party came early with the whole 9-yards of a full-on existential crisis. Which you can imagine left me in a little bit of a funk for the last few weeks as I’ve been mulling over these never-ending questions, but I’ve slowly been coming out of it with my new reset routine for 2019.

#1 Give Yourself a Vacation

Now I don’t exactly mean in the literal sense (although that would be quite nice to be able to take our private jet to some tropical island for a week, but for the rest of us…) taking a vacation can simply mean giving yourself a break, craving out some “me time”, and giving yourself time-off mentally, physically, and emotionally.

When we have a lot of emotion surging through us, mixed with a pile of mental clutter, it can be extremely taxing on our mind and body. During this time it is incredibly important to give yourself a vacation from your current situation. This is not a one-way ticket out of all responsibilities like picking your kids from school or paying the bills, it’s simply giving yourself permission turn on Airplane Mode to put aside any unnecessary physical, emotional, and mental clutter so you can free up space and time to sort through what you are feeling.

My vacation consisted of turning off my computer, my phone, and stashing anything work related in drawer to be continued later. I found myself not being able to write, edit, or do anything work related so instead of feeling guilty every day for not being productive, I chose to give myself a few guilt-free vacation days. I know that not everyone has the opportunity to work for themselves or work from home, but instead of taking a few days off, maybe just take the weekend for you. Or a Friday night to binge watch those movies and snuggle up in your blanket. Whatever “taking a vacation” means to you, indulge in it baby.

#2 Validate your feelings

A lot of the times when we are not being productive and our emotions feel scattered, we beat ourselves up for not being productive or not doing what we are supposed to be doing. We ridicule ourselves for feeling the way that we do or for not even being able to identify how we feel. This vicious ferris wheel of self-criticism has no end so please, I beg you, do not get on the ride.

Instead, treat yourself like you would a best friend. If your best friend were to come to you and tell you “I’m not feeling like myself. I am not being productive and I don’t get why. I’m so angry and sad.” I highly highly doubt that you would respond with “You suck. Get it together. You are not allowed to be angry or sad.” Unless you are the tough-love-I-actually-hate-my-best friend type then you would probably say something like this instead “It’s okay. Your feelings are valid. You’ll figure it out.”

We cannot help the way we feel so why deny and bully ourselves for it? We can only control how we choose to handle them.

#3 Do that thing

Use this moment as an opportunity to do that thing—lay in bed, eat Hot Cheetos, throw yourself a dance party—do it, do it all. Because you can and you deserve too.

One of the things that I find is the most important during this time is giving yourself the freedom to just be however you want (within the confines of the law of course) emotionally and physically. Do whatever you want while feeling however you feel to sort out whatever you need to sort out.

Acknowledge and honor what you need in this moment. If you prefer solitude, then do that. If you feel that you want to reach out and be with others, then make a plan. You have the power and the ability to do whatever your heart desires.  

#4 You are a Cake in the Making

It’s like baking a cake. You can choose the ingredients, how many layers, what type, what color and how to decorate it. You are the cake. And no matter how many times you feel you have been smushed, smashed, squashed, and eaten, you will become whole again. Maybe you’ll choose different ingredients, different decorations, or maybe instead you’ll make a pie. However long it takes, you’ll get there and you’ll be absolute perfection every time.

#5 You’ll get there

Don’t worry. Great cakes take time. You’re doing great love.